The Worst Service Ever Award goes to ... Big Boy

So I was in Lakeview a few hours ago. And apparently, I was stuck in their local hang out spot, which was the Big Boy Restaurant, yes, Big Boy. Just jammed pack full of random people. A couple people had wardrobes straight out of Dog the Bounty Hunter's closet. I felt very out of place. I was so out of place that even the black people looked at me like, "damn, where did these niggas come from?" I will admit that they had good lemonade, but that's besides the point.

Problem 1. We ended up with the waiter with the bifocals that make anyone look supremely blind. Coke bottles, if you will. And sadly she and this other waitress looked alike aside from the stereotypical "all white people look alike" tip. They were just really big and really sloppy and slow waitresses.

Problem 2. The silverware looked nasty as hell. One fork seriously looked like they dipped it in some cereal and let it dry. Aside from the taste, my lemonade looked suspect as hell. I tried to believe that the little floaties were lemon particles. If I die later, you know why.

Problem 3. The food took a week and two days to come out. We ordered french toast. Now, I'm not a culinary expert, but if I remember correctly, you slap them b*tches on a griddle and unless that griddle is on low heat, the bread begins to toast. With that said, it doesn't take an hour for bread to toast. Secondly, the waitress was retarded. i.e.

waitress: the bacon will be out in a second.
person 1: okay...
waitress: the baker hasn't quite finished them.

Bacon does not need to be baked, what in the hell. The sausage links came out before the bacon; doesn't bacon cook faster than sausage links due to density? Thirdly, the people to the left of us got their food faster than us despite the fact that they showed up fifteen minutes late than us.

Problem 4. Too many babies. They were more babies in that Big Boy than anywhere I've ever been. And they were squealing away. Lakeview must be on a sex schedule. There were babies EVERYWHERE.

When it was all said and done that waitress didn't get a tip.